Powered by Invision Power Board

 
  Pages: (2) [1] 2  ( Go to first unread post ) Reply to this topicStart new topicStart Poll

> Pip's stumble upon topic, just in case swear warning
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 02:34 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]


QUOTE
From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 21 May 2009 10.16am
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Pets in the building

Dear Helen,

Thankyou for your letter concerning pets in my apartment. I understand that having dogs in the apartment is a violation of the agreement due to the comfort and wellbeing of my neighbours and I am currently soundproofing my apartment with egg cartons as I realise my dogs can cause quite a bit of noise. Especially during feeding time when I release live rabbits.

Regards, David.

From: Helen Bailey
Date: Thursday 21 May 2009 11.18am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Pets in the building

Hello David

I have received your email and wish to remind you that the strata agreement states that no animals are allowed in the building regardless of if your apartment is soundproof. How many dogs do you have at the premises?

Helen

From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 21 May 2009 1.52pm
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Re: Re: Pets in the building

Dear Helen,

Currently I only have eight dogs but one is expecting puppies and I am very excited by this. I am hoping for a litter of at least ten as this is the number required to participate in dog sled racing. I have read every Jack London novel in preparation and have constructed my own sled from timber I borrowed from the construction site across the road during the night. I have devised a plan which I feel will ensure me taking first place in the next national dog sled championships. For the first year of the puppies life I intend to say the word mush then chase them violently around the apartment while yelling and hitting saucepan lids together. I have estimated that the soundproofing of my apartment should block out at least sixty percent of the noise and the dogs will learn to associate the word mush with great fear so when I yell it on race day, the panic and released adrenaline will spur them on to being winners. I am so confident of this being a foolproof plan that I intend to sell all my furniture the day before the race and bet the proceeds on coming first place.

Regards, David.

From: Helen Bailey
Date: Friday 22 May 2009 9.43am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building

David, I am unsure what to make of your email. Do you have pets in the apartment or not?

Helen

From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 22 May 2009 11.27am
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building

Dear Helen,

No. I have a goldfish but due to the air conditioner in my apartment being stuck on a constant two degrees celcius, the water in its bowl is iced over and he has not moved for a while so I do not think he is capable of disturbing the neighbours. The ducks in the bathroom are not mine. The noise which my neighbours possibly mistook for a dog in the apartment is just the looping tape I have of dogs barking which I play at high volume while I am at work to deter potential burglars from breaking in and stealing my tupperware. I need it to keep food fresh. Once I ate leftover chinese that had been kept in an unsealed container and I experienced complete awareness. The next night I tried eating it again but only experienced chest pains and diarrhoea.

Regards, David.

From: Helen Bailey
Date: Friday 22 May 2009 1.46pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building

Hello David

You cannot play sounds of dogs or any noise at a volume that disturbs others. I am sure you can appreciate that these rules are for the benefit of all residents of the building. Fish are fine. You cannot have ducks in the apartment though. If it was small birds that would be ok.

Helen

From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 22 May 2009 2.18pm
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building

Dear Helen,

They are very small ducks.

Regards, David.

From: Helen Bailey
Date: Friday 22 May 2009 4.06pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building

David, under section 4 of the strata residency agreement it states that you cannot have pets. You agreed to these rules when you signed the forms. These rules are set out to benefit everyone in the building including yourself. Do you have a telephone number I can call you on to discuss?

Helen

From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 22 May 2009 5.02pm
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building

Dear Helen,

The ducks will no doubt be flying south for the winter soon so it will not be an issue. It is probably for the best as they are not getting along very well with my seventeen cats anyway. .

Regards, David.

From: Helen Bailey
Date: Monday 25 May 2009 9.22am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building

David, I am just going to write on the forms that we have investigated and you do not have any pets.

Helen


quoted because link is not exactly kid friendly

This post has been edited by Pip on Aug 4 2009, 03:40 PM


--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
United States
Marigi
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 02:36 PM
Quote Post


PLEASE USE CAPS IF YOU INTEND ON BEING TAKEN SERIOUSLY.
[*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 4876
Member No.: 726
Joined: 14-December 04

Status: (0d) [--]


Yes!

My last apartment, the landlord never fixed ****.

Me: "Hey *****, the top lock of my door broke."
Landlord: "Ok, I'll be over by the end of the day to fix it!"
Never got fixed.

Me: "Hey mother ****er, the A/C is broken."
Landlord: "Ok, I'll fix it soon!"
3 weeks later. -_-

AND SO ON AND SO ON


--------------------
user posted image
user posted image
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOLMSN
Top
Denmark
Mecha the Slag
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:06 PM
Quote Post


http://mechaware.net
[*][*][*][*][*]
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 11816
Member No.: 728
Joined: 15-December 04

Status: (0d) [--]


hahahaha


--------------------




MechaWare GamesMechaSourceMechaWare for CellphonesMechaWare on Steam

PMUsers WebsiteMSN
Top
United Kingdom
Hippoman
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:22 PM
Quote Post


Cam 24/7
[*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 2935
Member No.: 74
Joined: 16-October 03

Status: (0d) [--]


Read already but awesome.

I am my landlord :l

People sometimes ***** at me.


--------------------
QUOTE
so edgy and cool


You know I never claimed/That I was a stone/And you love a stone.

PMEmail Poster
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:27 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]


user posted image


--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:30 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]




--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
United States
The Pyro
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:36 PM
Quote Post



[*][*][*][*][*]


Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 3248
Member No.: 2971
Joined: 21-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]


QUOTE (Pip @ Aug 4 2009, 03:27 PM)
user posted image

dzdsfdsadfasdf

this is amazing


--------------------
user posted image
PMEmail PosterMSN
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:38 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]




--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
Estonia
Sparks
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:40 PM
Quote Post


hurr hurr freakin hurr
[*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 1131
Member No.: 2198
Joined: 16-June 06

Status: (0d) [--]


QUOTE
A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."
wow


--------------------
PMEmail PosterAOLMSN
Top
Canada
Demonlemon
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:41 PM
Quote Post


MY CHILDREN COMETH
[*][*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5647
Member No.: 3281
Joined: 9-February 07

Status: (0d) [--]


ffffffffff


--------------------
If life gives you lemons... RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!
user posted image
TCOTL Reference Humanoid reference Drawings/sprites people have made me.user posted image
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
Estonia
Sparks
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:43 PM
Quote Post


hurr hurr freakin hurr
[*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 1131
Member No.: 2198
Joined: 16-June 06

Status: (0d) [--]


user posted image
haha


--------------------
PMEmail PosterAOLMSN
Top
United States
shroomguy
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:45 PM
Quote Post


COWBOY UP
[*][*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 2087
Member No.: 5365
Joined: 31-May 08

Status: (0d) [--]


Ha


--------------------
QUOTE
Dude


he's shroomguy

he's Segata Sanshiro, Bruce Lee and Ryu Hayabusa all fused together

Also Rorschach
PMEmail PosterIntegrity Messenger IMAOLYahooMSN
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:45 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]




--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 03:51 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]




--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 04:13 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]




--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
Russia
Mr. Aforcer
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 04:33 PM
Quote Post


KAH-PEEWLS HERE
[*][*][*][*][*]
[*][*][*][*][X]
[*][KFC]

Group Icon
Group: Badge Mod
Posts: 35496
Member No.: 588
Joined: 5-September 04

Status: (0d) [--]


I like this topic.


--------------------
PMEmail PosterAOL
Top
Estonia
Sparks
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 04:34 PM
Quote Post


hurr hurr freakin hurr
[*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 1131
Member No.: 2198
Joined: 16-June 06

Status: (0d) [--]


QUOTE (Pip @ Aug 4 2009, 03:45 PM)
http://www.gamesolo.com/flash-game/pacxon.html

wtf I played that for an hour


--------------------
PMEmail PosterAOLMSN
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 04:38 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]




--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 05:08 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]


user posted image


--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
United Kingdom
Pip
Posted: Aug 4 2009, 05:15 PM
Quote Post


you are now reading my posts in chris tucker's voice
[*][*][*]

Group Icon
Group: Members
Posts: 5151
Member No.: 2941
Joined: 13-November 06

Status: (0d) [--]




--------------------
**** are p. cool
PMEmail PosterUsers WebsiteAOL
Top
1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
0 Members:

  Topic Options Topic Options Pages: (2) [1] 2  Reply to this topicStart new topicStart Poll

 




[ Script Execution time: 0.0692 ]   [ 14 queries used ]   [ GZIP Enabled ]   [ Server Load: 0.98 ]