Metroid Amalgamation (fanfic), My fanfic (Hey, its art!)

Note: Thanks to Chaos:\\ for for communisticizing it
Part I (one)
Notes: I changed her description from what she looked like in my "Dark Samus" drawing. I'm going to redraw to reflect the new look.

Samus ran down a soft earthen path. It had been weeks since the battle with the Metroid Prime. She had detected high levels of Phazon and unusual Metroid signatures on the planet Ralager XXV. She had landed to investigate, and had discovered another downed Space Pirate vessel. There were signs of a struggle, and traces of Phazon radiation. "15.2 Randens" her visor had indicated, barely enough to trigger it... But still, she couldn't shake the feeling that something unusual was going on...

She felt her heart skip a beat as she fell. She had gotten so lost in her thinking that she didn't look down to see where she was going. She looked down to see what had tripped her. She saw a large root sticking out of the ground. She was distracted by the root, so she didn't notice her radiation meter slowly climbing. When she finally noticed it, it was at half and still climbing so she instinctively activated her Phazon Suit. She looked around for the source of the radiation, and there in the middle of a brightly lit clearing a few yards a way was a Metroid. She activated her scan visor. No data was found on the species, but scans indicated it had the ability to split. "Probably just a slightly mutated Fusion Metroid…" She muttered. She powered up a blast, but she wasn't quick enough. It was onto her.

This is where things went horribly wrong. She felt a white hot pain all over her body and her visor became so distorted the warning messages flashing across it were not readable. The warning sounds of her life support system failing were screeching over and over. This is it she thought... this is the end... but to her surprise, it all stopped... her visor came back online. The warning sounds quit. But... where was the Metroid?! She spun around, it was gone! "What the hell?!" she yelled. Her life support system had gone completely off-line.

She looked down at her suit. It was totally transformed. It had been turned crystal clear, and her clothes underneath the suit were intact. "Thank god." she thought as she blushed a little. But the oddest thing was the fact that the suit had bonded to her body in several places, and where her main systems used to be located, there were now large clusters of Metroid Nuclei.

This post has been edited by Banana Head on Mar 5 2004, 09:22 PM

I like it so far, although you probably could have fit more in one post. The only thing that is kinda wierd is the planet name. I can understand Tallon IV, and Oormine II, but RalagarXXV would mean its the 25th planet they've named after 'Ralagar'! That's a hella lotta planets. But I like the story, and I look forward to the next chapter.

yeah i know i coulda fit more in one post, but im just post it as i write it

Ooo! fancyful...

Darn it, if you're gonna do fanfics,

USE PROPER ENGLISH, PLEASE.


Interesting story, though. And besides, what if her clothes were off? She's got a suit covering her. And it's not aliens care about human parts.


Although, you did a good job with the technical terms of Metroid.

Yoshiman, i hate the english as much as you do. Thus, i professionally edited it. Should be a lot more readable now:

Part I (one)
Notes: I changed her description from what she looked like in my “Dark Samus” drawing. I’m going to redraw to reflect the new look.

Samus ran down a soft earthen path. It had been weeks since the battle with the Metroid Prime. She had detected high levels of Phazon and unusual Metroid signatures on the planet Ralager XXV. She had landed to investigate, and had discovered another downed Space Pirate vessel. There were signs of a struggle, and traces of Phazon radiation. "15.2 Randens" her visor had indicated, barely enough to trigger it... But still, she couldn't shake the feeling that something unusual was going on...

She felt her heart skip a beat as she fell. She had gotten so lost in her thinking that she didn’t look down to see where she was going. She looked down to see what had tripped her. She saw a large root sticking out of the ground. She was distracted by the root, so she didn't notice her radiation meter slowly climbing. When she finally noticed it, it was at half and still climbing so she instinctively activated her Phazon Suit. She looked around for the source of the radiation, and there in the middle of a brightly lit clearing a few yards a way was a Metroid. She activated her scan visor. No data was found on the species, but scans indicated it had the ability to split. "Probably just a slightly mutated Fusion Metroid…" She muttered. She powered up a blast, but she wasn't quick enough. It was onto her.

This is where things went horribly wrong. She felt a white hot pain all over her body and her visor became so distorted the warning messages flashing across it were not readable. The warning sounds of her life support system failing were screeching over and over. This is it she thought... this is the end... but to her surprise, it all stopped... her visor came back online. The warning sounds quit. But... where was the Metroid?! She spun around, it was gone! “What the hell?!" she yelled. Her life support system had gone completely off-line.

She looked down at her suit. It was totally transformed. It had been turned crystal clear, and her clothes underneath the suit were intact. "Thank god." she thought as she blushed a little. But the oddest thing was the fact that the suit had bonded to her body in several places, and where her main systems used to be located, there were now large clusters of Metroid Nuclei.

What wasn't in proper English? I understood it perfectly. Her suit is 'CRYSTAL CLEAR' so it is see through. Anyone would be embarrassed if they don't have any clothes on, even if it's only aliens on the planet.

What wasn't in proper English? I understood it perfectly. Her suit is 'CRYSTAL CLEAR' so it is see through. Anyone would be embarrassed if they don't have any clothes on, even if it's only aliens on the planet.

Yeah bit what if the Federation comes and says "Samus, we don't run a porno business..."



Anyway, good so far. It's called a "Fission" Metroid, not Fusion, by the way.

Great story telling, but... btutbuaubsntsnlsnakdfasmdsa;;'asdlkopkl[o

*metroid fanboy nitpicky time*
METROID PRIME SPOILERS BELOW
Samus lost her Phazon suit at the end of MP. Also, you gotta explain about the source of the phazon and Fission Metroids. In MP, it was caused by the giant meteor, which had MP in it. Of course, this planet could have something besides that, but if you're trying to save it for later, that's cool too.

"She had landed to investigate, and had discovered another downed Space Pirate vessel. There were signs of a struggle, and traces of Phazon radiation."...=P i hope that is enough explenation, plus it WASN'T a fission metroid, it was an Infestation Metroid, she only thought i was a fission metroid because of what her scans indicated